Home Is a Memory: Coping with Homesickness as an Immigrant

For many immigrants, “home” isn’t just a place—it’s a sound, a smell, a taste, a memory. It’s your aunt’s laugh echoing in the kitchen, the clatter of buses through crowded markets, the feeling of sweat on your back as you dance at a cousin’s wedding. When you leave your country of origin, you don’t just leave geography behind—you leave a part of yourself. And sometimes, that ache doesn’t go away.

Homesickness is one of the most common but least talked-about aspects of the immigrant experience. It’s not just for college students or people on vacation. It can affect anyone who has had to leave behind their familiar world—especially those who didn’t have much of a choice in the matter.

The Emotional Weight of Homesickness

Homesickness isn’t just missing “home” as a concept. It’s mourning the loss of a way of life.

• Cultural disconnection: Being away from your cultural practices, language, humour, and food can make you feel like a stranger in your own body.

• Guilt and nostalgia: You may romanticize what you left behind, or feel guilty for not doing more to stay connected to it.

• Sense of rootlessness: When your sense of identity was tied to your home environment, being removed from it can create an internal void.

This emotional weight can compound existing stressors: finding work, managing paperwork, adapting to new norms, dealing with racism or microaggressions, and trying to build a new life.

When Home Isn’t Just Far Away—It’s Unreachable

For many immigrants, returning home isn’t an option due to war, political instability, cost, family separation, or refugee status. When home becomes a memory instead of a possibility, the grief can feel overwhelming.

There’s also a profound sense of limbo. You’re not fully of your new country, but you can’t return to the old one either. It’s a floating existence that makes it hard to feel grounded or “belong” anywhere.

How Homesickness Shows Up

Homesickness is often invisible, and many immigrants may not even realize that’s what they’re experiencing. It can look like:

• Constant fatigue or low motivation

• Irritability or frequent sadness

• An obsession with news from home

• Withdrawal from social activities

• Overidentification with productivity to avoid emotions

You might find yourself replaying old songs from your childhood or smelling a familiar dish in a restaurant and crying for reasons you don’t fully understand. That’s grief—and it’s valid.

Strategies for Coping with Homesickness

Healing from homesickness doesn’t mean “getting over” your love for home. It means learning how to honour that love without letting the loss consume you.

• Create rituals that connect you to home: Cook traditional meals, celebrate cultural holidays, listen to music in your mother tongue, wear clothing that reminds you of home.

• Build community: Find local groups of people from your cultural background or other immigrants who understand what you’re going through.

• Tell your story: Journaling, talking to a therapist, or even creating art about your experience can help you make meaning of your grief.

• Let nostalgia be a bridge, not a trap: It’s okay to remember the past, but don’t let it prevent you from being present. What parts of “home” can you recreate here?

• Seek professional support: A culturally responsive therapist can help validate your experience and guide you through complex emotions without minimizing them.

For Service Providers

If you work with immigrants, ask gentle, open-ended questions like:

• “What do you miss most about home?”

• “What helps you feel connected to your culture?”

• “Are there times of year that are harder for you emotionally?”

Normalize that homesickness is not a weakness—it’s a form of grief, and grief deserves compassion, not shame.

A Final Word

To those aching for a home that no longer exists, you are not broken. Your longing is a testament to how deeply you’ve loved, how much you’ve survived, and how fiercely you still carry your roots.

You don’t have to choose between who you were and who you are becoming. Both can exist in you. And even if home feels far away, you are allowed to recreate pieces of it—wherever you are.

Nereah Felix is a Registered Psychotherapist at Catharsis Psychology and Psychotherapy.